Loves A Bitch

I know how

You long for me

I long for him in the same way

Your head is turned towards me,

My eyes stuck on him

It’s not okay

 

And when I lie down at night

And feel empty

I know you feel that too

I wouldn’t wish that on my worst enemy

So why the hell do I do it to you

 

It’s a bitter ordeal were in,

My love it’s true

How love is the healing balm

But there ain’t enough for all of us

Because were selfish

And we want what’s called love

Or more like what it appears to be

 

It’s a painful wretched sort of curse

For you to hold my skirt

And me to tug on his boot

It’s a shame I do that to you…

 

When I know so well that passion

That stirs my blood at night

When I think of him

And his sweet whispers

That bid my heart to beat

 

And I know well

The taste of the salt

On my cheeks

Filling up a bucket of memory

And delicate tissues of shame

 

Why did I run away

Twas because you

Were too bland for my taste,

My buds wanted more

My senses craved what could never be mine

To shiver at your touch

And have you look into my eyes

And call me divine,

Never mind

Noble and honorable approach

I wanted the most.

 

Love me to death

And beyond

Hold my heart

And sing our love from the rooftops

Bleed through me the fiber that makes up

Your soul

But you didn’t

So I turned cold

 

And I shouldred you

While I smothered him

In all you weren’t

In all that was mine

But you couldn’t have

It was a stab from the front

Straight to the back

 

As you walk away

I can see the humiliation

On your face

But you wont leave

You wont leave

Because the string

That ties you

Tight around my finger

Is the same string

That damns me to be puppeted

By those who weren’t meant for me

For all eternity

My hell and penance

For denying the agony

That you breathe in

Whenever our eyes meet

And I’m reminded of your admiration

 

In that crooked smile

That was bewitching

Cuz it was never quite right

But it was mine…

 

All you wanted was

To hold my whole heart

And learn to love

But I sinned

And fractionated it out instead

Something unforgivable

When you had a bid for the highest price

On the forewalls

Of this heart I wouldn’t give you…

And yet you still looked at me

Without disgust

Even I cannot manage that anymore.

 

And I sit,

And I ponder

And I say love is a bitch,

But no wonder

You were sitting arms stretched

Waiting for me all along

 

So why can’t I want you…

 

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