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Unknown pain

I’ve struggled with sadness for far too long .
I listen to sad, love , happy , suicidal, angry, and mixed emotional songs.
Everyday I criticize myself.
I tell myself I’m okey.
I tell myself I’m not.
I’ve tried taking my life thinking it’s rhe answer.
I’ve tried different , many social media sites/apps.
I’ve tried seeking help.
I’m not that great at talking to my family .
I’m hurting inside deeply.
Yet you’ll see me smile a lot so brightly youd never think twice.
Yet my eyes burn with such intensity that you’ll see what I’m truly hiding as my face gives me away.
I used to write so good but for the wrong reasons but now I have not a clue how or what to do anymore.

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