Trees, sun, grass, clouds, birds and flowers are what we can all see. Through normal eyes the world is beautiful, colourful and bright but through my eyes the world is black and white, dull and plain. A normal person feels alive and feels real. So, tell me why i feel like i am a soul stuck in the wrong body. So, tell me why i feel that my life is all one big dream. Tell me why i feel like i am not real like i am a doll a child is playing with. Tell me why i feel like i don’t belong. Tell me why i feel like i am spectating my own life. Tell me why i am alive but i don’t feel alive. Tell me why.
This cannot be normal, in fact it’s not normal this is what it’s like to have depression over take you. Where did the colour go when you overtook me? Where did my happiness, energy, motivation, courage, strength, hope, peace, humor, and appetite go? They must have known you were coming so they run and hide. I don’t blame them. Are they ever coming back?
Tell me why your here. Tell me what it is that you want. You already took my soul, what more do you want? All i have left to offer is the home that soul once lived in. Why would you want that? The home to that soul is empty, it’s cold, dark, self-destructed, worn out, drained and dead. There is no value left, not that there ever was value.
All i ask is to have my life back, my soul, my appetite, my happiness, my energy, my motivation, my courage, my strength, some hope, peace and humor. If i am not pushing it i would also like to see the world through normal eyes and to feel real, to feel alive. Is that too much to ask for?
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