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Illusions Shattered

My thoughts often wonder soaring heights I never knew
They often wonder back to the time when there was you.
I don’t know what I was thinking, I could be your lover true.
But in the longrun I found out, it was something I couldn’t do.

For love was what I needed, and I needed to be loved
But this was not what you wanted, nor were you thinking of
In time I began to pine, you were sent from above
and then the last time when I received a couple of hugs

Everything I ever believed in shattered before my very eyes
Belief in spiritual bonds and soulmate love disguised
For being able to feel such, took me to a whole new high
But realisitically it’s false, for you feel not I

Hopes for a spiritual evolution, a change in spiritual being
I remember the difference in feeling and seeing
But such a waste of time if only one soul is feeling
I have now awakened from this fantastical dreaming.

I am on my own, with no anchor for my soul
No yearning within, no desire to hold
No fresh new outlook or zest for old
Just taking up space where the wind doesnt blow.

All that I knew has just disappeared
never a hope to again hold you near
No hope to freely call you a friend
No hope at all, this is the end.

I remember that day, long ago, when I died
That was the last day I ever cried
I mourned my own death, my loss of you
While you smiled and walked away with someone I knew

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