I don’t read poetry anymore. It’s not that the writer’s aren’t good.
Or that I’ve lost interest.
I don’t read poetry because everyone seems to be either in love
(and I’m not)
or everyone is heartbroken
(and I don’t want to be reminded)
Or perhaps I just don’t believe they can relate to me anymore. (Yeah, don’t consider the possibility you can’t relate to them anymore)
Who else had given seven years of their love to their best friend and it remain unrequited?
Who else finally managed to fall in love with a different girl only to have her taken from you?
(You blame her family, but she probably just hated you for fucking her life up)
Or for your last ditch effort at love, she ends up cutting contact for no reason, only for you to find out months later she was pregnant?
That’s the one that finished me.
Unrequited love turned to a sex addiction that destroyed so many people.
(I was so selfish)
Don’t say it doesn’t have a price because I can take you to the grave of a girl who killed herself because I couldn’t reciprocate that she fell for me.
(It’s been two years and i still blame myself. i’m so sorry)
So the sex turned to alcohol and I wanted to feel numb. Just make me numb to it all.
I want to love someone who isn’t married. Who doesn’t already have a boyfriend. Who won’t give up on me.
(I’ve long since given up on myself)
But I’m just a time bomb in their lives. An inferno that leaves permanent wounds.
Maybe that’s why my best friend never fell for me.
I don’t want me either.
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poetry as confessional…painful to read, but that’s as it should be. poetry should evoke a spectrum of emotions, including the gut wrenching.
Thank you. I was not in a pleasant state of mind when I wrote this, and I’m glad that was conveyed.
aah love, that fatal addiction to someone that even the most experienced humanz fall prey to, but lovez a guessing game, like no one ever teachez you how to love, you just copy what you see and hear from moviez and music, so of course youre gonna fuk it up from time to time, but lifez just a game and youre just your most current action carrying around a bunch of memoriez, just a mix of good and bad experiencez that you get decide not just what they mean to you but how much they mean to you too, and if you feel that theyre driving you crazy then fuk it, just be crazy and remember them differently ha worst case scenario you go back to feeling the way you do now, az for love itz just a mini game where every break up sendz you back to the start, so you can play az many timez az you want until you finally beat that particular mini game, practice makez if not perfect then at the very least a little better haha
Quite a unique way of looking at it I guess.
ha nice writing by the way, probably should have said that first lop but whatevz, I BELIEVE IN YOU JENKINZ!!
Thanks so much. 🙂
Painful, revealing, hope getting this off your chest will minimize the pain. tfs
Thank you for reading. 🙂