a rap i wrote at like 3am and i was high on sleep depravation and medication

sometimes you just dont wanna go on
sometimes you hit the ground just that fucking hard
sometimes its impossible to get up and move
sometimes you cant just bite your tongue and push through
i dont know about you but ive had plenty of times where i could turn on a dime and blam eliminate myself from the game but hey
that’d be a shitty kdr
i intend to go very far and if im quitting this game ima leave you some scars
regardless
giving up is not the answer that youre lookin for
because givin up is givin in and giving over control to the winds and saying choke me harder to a manic killer with nasty intent for you when youre dead limp and youre spent but yeah
enough with gritty imagery
this life is about the fight and neva kneeling till you drop to one knee and say please oh dear lord please enslave me to yourself because i dont want to serve anyone else for the rest of time left or right up or down i want you there beside me
and cant you see reality is only a damn dlc to emotion
the potion
the fountain of youth
no point living longer if youre the sole survivor
life is a game meant for two
thats on you
and me
in this reality
we gotta make those connections
analyze your reflections on this world and its inhabitants invented breath mints for a more pleasant hello how adorable
we also invented fake snow glow in the dark stars weapons and words that leave scars and those that dont
they just obliterate the person
physical emotional mental
gone
and i know this poem is long but thats in the writing the livin it
the memory is quicker and i dont want to remember me living insida liquor bottle ignoring the world the bonds the blondes brunettes and gingersnaps out there or pretending ill be single till these shoes are threadbare
ILL GET THERE
some how
ill get over my last OTL
move on, ringing different doorbells and choosing to live out in the midst but hey
thats just ten minutes of my mind in a shower
i got the power
to write whatever the hell i want because my brain dont need drugs to pump out lyrics like starbucks paper coffee mugs and thats all i need to say today because i still really need to wash my hair and go to sleep but just beware of limiting yourself until you have no depth
because if you have no deep end than you wont have deep friends and when someone stares into your eyes they cant dive in they have to wade like a 700 pound orangutan
and they’ll be disgusted and humiliated and theyll finally know that you are nothing but a goddamned empty shell bluffing at humanity just trying to convince yourself that youre just FINE
and HAPPY
and someday youll be fulfilled
but honey on the real youll be like this till you die as you lie and cry and buy more belongings and bullshit and die knowing you wasted your ENTIRE FUCKING LIFE
fucking your entire life up until you reached the point where you dont see tomorrow
the sorrow its seeping
tomorrow is creeping away
and away it will stay
youre forever stuck
forever trapped
in today

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